When You Feel Helpless About the State of the World
Even for the most optimistic among us, the current state of the world can feel pretty overwhelming. It’s not a big stretch right now to wonder whether the world in which we’re raising our children is going to be a decent place for them.
Many conversations in my office over the last two years have centered around wanting to be a change-maker, but feeling helpless to do anything about it. How do we have any influence in the big-picture, serious problems in the world? How do we take action in a meaningful way when our lives are so full with going to work, parenting, managing our own mental health. Just getting through the day can be hard enough much of the time.
Two uncomfortable feelings can surface during times like these: guilt and helplessness.
Guilt
Let’s give ourselves permission to step out of comparative suffering. Yes, we live in privilege. Yes, your suffering is still real and still matters. Your hard things are very real and hard and they matter. Don’t be hard on yourself for struggling with your everyday hard things, even when other people around the world are dealing with different hard things.
Helplessness
Oof. This one is hard too. Here’s the thing: you actually can do very little to effect change on things on the other side of the world. Here’s something to consider: your actions still matter. You change the world when you are kind to strangers. When you raise your children to love and accept others. When you teach your children to think critically and challenge injustice, even in seemingly small ways. When we love. When we heal.
“You are allowed to protect your energy and your well-being. Even in the face of massive suffering in the world. Especially in the face of such suffering. ”
It’s okay to take a break from the media. We help no one when we are experiencing vicarious trauma from over-consuming information about terrible things happening in the world. I can’t do my job as a therapist when I’m burnt out, experiencing secondary trauma, or compassion fatigue. Managing that for myself is crucial in my ability to show up for my job, for my family, and for my own self.
So here’s the antidote to helplessness about big, scary things in the world: shine your light. Be a light in your little corner of the world. As singer Jeremy Fisher says, Shine a little light where you need it the most.